I Can't Protect You
by i Mel-chan i
Summary: As Meyrin looks over Athrun's hospitalize body, she can't helps to think that maybe she should be stronger.


Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed Destiny or any of their characters.

_"I can't protect you"_

"Meyrin?"

"Huh?" Asked the red haired girl; leaving her eyes for a moment off Athrun. She turned her head to view the auburn haired girl wearing the Orb uniform. The girl was rather kind to her even though she was a Natural. In fact she had quickly become friends with the girl mostly because of their similar experiences as CIC officers.

"I'm sorry Miriallia-san I wasn't listening," she said guilty focusing her eyes back on Athrun.

"I was going to suggest you eat something. You've been by Athrun's side for almost the entire day."

"I see, but you shouldn't worry about me. I'm okay," the red haired girl said turning her head to give hr a reassuring smile. Miriallia still looked unconvinced, but apparently staying by Athrun's side was important, so she just nodded and then left. As soon as the swooshing doors, shut tight behind Miriallia everything grew quiet, except for the usual buzzing of the various machines.

Her silver blue eyes went back to his state. It really did pain her to see him like this. He wasn't the invisible man she saw shooting down targets with perfect aim, piloting a mobile suit expertly like it was a bike, or else defeating his enemies in one or two blows. No, he wasn't that man she believed was invincible; he was now lying on a hospital bed barely clinging to his life.

Reaching out she grabbed his hand making her spirits lower even more. It lay cold and pale within her tiny hand. She was quiet for a few moments, but then she spoke softly.

"Athrun," she whispered to his unconscious form. "I'm sorry about all this, because I know…. Its-its all my fault," she stuttered. He remained motionless on the hospital bed.

"If-if you never tried to protect me…" Again Meyrin paused remembering how the GOUF had escalated into flames and broken apart like a child's toy. While in the cockpit, she held her breath awaiting the sharp pains of death, but it never came. Instead she found herself being held tightly and being protected from the flames and debris that was raining down upon them. It was him.

"It'll be okay," he said as they both fell from the sky into the violent water below. Lost for words, she nodded. _Yes, it will be okay_, she thought, _everything will be okay._ She believed his words, even though her entire surrounding told her otherwise. They would be burned to death, or else drown, either way there was no way they could possibly make this alive. But still she believed him. She smiled at him hugging him even tighter before they met the icy cold water. Then everything went black.

Now that Meyrin sat by his bedside, she knew this was all her fault. Maybe if she hadn't been so selfish and gladly took the protection that Athrun was offering her. Maybe if she had taken her share of the pain that he had to endure because of her, then maybe he wouldn't be in this state.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered again. "You were able to protect me, while I couldn't do anything for you."

She held his lifeless hand, tears beginning to fill up in her eyes.

"I'm not strong like you. I can't pilot mobile suits, fight in battles, or fire a gun like you can. I can't even stand up like myself," she replied forcing a small smile on her lips. "I thought that if I joined ZAFT then, maybe I could become stronger. I wanted to change to a much stronger person, who won't be so easily scared by others and have another's rely on me, instead of me relaying on them.

"But-but I guess I was wrong." At that moment she broke drown, tears streaming down her cheeks and slowly following on Athrun's bed.

"I was wrong; I'll never be as strong like you, or Lunamaria. I can never protect you because I'm weak."

"I'm too weak," she sobbed again. "That's why you're lying lifeless in this hospital bed. You're dying and its all because of me!"

She bended her head down into the covers and sobbed about her inabilities. She cried for a good number of minutes until she felt her hand being held tightly. Quickly lifting her head, she saw that it was Athrun that had squeezed her hand. "Its- its okay…" he whispered in an almost inaudible voice.

She jumped on her seat as though she had gotten shock.

"Athrun-san!" she cried out happily.

But he was still as motionless as he was a few minutes ago. Maybe he was dreaming and was just sleep talking. There couldn't have been a way that he was listening, or was there?

"Athrun-san?" Meyrin asked again, sitting on the edge of her seat.

"Mey…rin…" he whispered.

She pushed away the tears that were streaming down. "Yes, its me," she whispered, gripping his hand tighter.

"It'll—it'll be alright…. I'll…protect…you," he whispered each word leaving him even more tired.

She closed her eyes absorbing his words. Feeling rejuvenated, as if someone had wiped away her own tears or as if someone had just given her a hug after crying.

"Don't protect me, Athrun…. I- I want to protect you."

She didn't notice the faint footsteps that were leaving, or the strips of blonde hair from the owner.

**A/N**: Well its not one of my best works, but I wanted was just thinking on why Cagalli let Meyrin take care of Athrun. And besides that I had a three hour block between classes and I was extremely bored.

So let me hear what you think, whether good or bad.

--Mel


End file.
